Tag Archives: nerds

The valuable message in “She’s Out of My League”

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Filed under beauty bias

Romantic comedies targeting 18-35 year-olds are invariably raunchy, sexy and overloaded with F-Bombs, but I find most of them hilarious and, more importantly, concluding with a important message that I hope isn’t lost in the muck of rudeness, incivility, and dysfunctional behavior.  In “She’s Out of My League,” adorable Alice Eve develops a liking for Jay Baruchel who plays a scrawny quasi-nerd. His friends and annoying family reinforce his own belief that she is way too good for him.  In the end, his cruelist friend becomes enlighted, discovering that a total babe like Alice can actually overcome Jay’s physical shortcomings and find him attractive because, well, he’s a really nice guy with a sense of humor and humanity. 

It’s the ancient formula–boy wins girl, boy loses girl, boy wins girl back–but it’s refreshing to see his all his friends, family members and other uncouth clowns pleased that the two are meant for each other.  I know that crassness of the movie is intentionally outrageous just to get a laugh, and much of it is funny, but if you try to duplicate it at home, you’re going to get smacked.

Men deal with physical image issues, too.

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Filed under Uncategorized

Without question, enormous pressure is placed on women to be attractive, slim, and physically fit. As research for my book, “Facing the World,” I’ve been reading a number of excellent books on this issue, and each one makes references to countless studies and surveys supporting the bias toward beauty and its impact on women, including many stunning women who focus on their perceived flaws.

The pressure on men is minimal in comparison. At least that is what we can assume since I’m not finding much mention of the problems facing men who are nerdy looking, chubby, short, or balding. The demands placed on men to look and act like Real Men is not taken seriously enough to warrant an entire book. The only one that comes close–but not very close–was written by a man, Gordon L. Patzer, Ph.D. And I guess short men and geeky guys don’t form support groups that are facilitated by psychologists who write books about them.

I’m certain studies and surveys are out there, such as the psychological factors responsible sexual dysfunction. I’ll keep looking.